BOC: Holiday Wishes

[John A Swartz]

O.K., I'm not the first guy to hack up the words to "'Twas the Night
Before Christmas", and my poetry may be a little suspect, but what the
hell... Happy Holidays to you all!!

John

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that Blue Oyster Cult soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of guitars danced in their heads;
And Suzy in leather, and I with some beer,
Had just settled down for some late-evening cheer,

When out on the lawn there arose such a noise,
I sprang from the bed to see if it was the Oyster Boys.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Taking care not to hit Suzy - my arm's in a cast.

The Harvest moon shining on the snow in the night
evoked memories of mirror-balls lit by laser light.
When, what to my wondering eyes should I spy,
But a space ship that looked like a wheel in the sky.

It flew to my house, skimming over the trees;
I got to my feet, then fell to my knees.
A door opened wide and a voice did exhult,
"Here they come - from New York City - the amazing BLUE OYSTER CULT!!"

And then, in a twinkling, they opened my door
and Danny Miranda stood on the floor.
He carried a sack the size of a gorilla.
Then he pulled out his bass, and played the riff to "Godzilla".

Then through the door came Bobby Rondinelli.
He shook, when he laughed like a bowl full of jelly.
With cigarette dangling from his lower lip,
Allen Lanier next arrived from the ship.

Their sound shook the house from the earth to the skies,
I thought it would melt both my ears and my eyes.
But as we all delighted in the sound, we all knew
that soon we'd be greeted by the other two...

Not removing his shades as he entered the room,
in came the figure of one Eric Bloom.
And pulling a knife from out of the sack,
looked at Suzy saying "I'd like to see you in black".

A lift of his shades and a wink from one peeper,
Soon gave me to know I should not fear the Reaper;
He spoke not a word, but gave me no alarm,
carving "Good Health to You" upon the cast on my arm.

Buck Dharma arrived next on the scene without fail.
With guitar in hand, he proceeded to wail.
With the band now complete, and with all in position,
the sound dominated us, and we fell to submission.

The music engulfed us, as we knew it would.
We were damaged, and we liked it, and we all understood.
They left much too soon, but after this rocking
they left "Heaven Forbid" and "Flat Out" in our stockings.

They left in their ship, and as it flew overhead
three men in black appeared - "Don't Report This", they said.
But I heard them exclaim, as they flew out of view,
"HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND THE JOKE'S . . . ON YOU!!!"