OFF: GODZILLA REVIEW

[Nick English]

> > I agree.  Yeah, the Frenchmen are shown as fussy about the food and coffee,
> > but they're shown as clever and very competant operators--in fact, the most
> > competant in the film.
>
> I thought the food scenes were pretty humorous myself, especially the
> way they made the cup of the "bad American coffee" look like it was
> from Starbucks.

I still say they did a hack job on the French. The coffee scenes made
them look pretty prissy and sissy if you ask me. And the absolute
stupidity of them chewing gum to 'look more American', and of Jean
Reno not being able to do an American accent unless he's aping Elvis.
This from the French Secret Service?! Also, someone mentioned that
the movie shows the French 'taking responsibility for their actions'.
Not so. If they were taking responsibility for Godzilla, they would
have offered overt military help. Instead, they sent clandestine
operatives to try to quietly get rid of the problem. Reno's character
even says as much. Add to this the fact that very few people die in
this film, and most of them are the French Secret Service dudes.
Given how poorly the rest of this movie was written, I could believe
that all this stuff was meant as innocent comic relief, not intended
to detract from the French characters. But apparently, Devlin and
Emmerich have little or no ability to write a logical, competent
script.

> > Most folks I know complained about the US armed services being painted with
> > a gigantic Stupid Brush--everything from "There wouldn't be a colonel
> > running that operation", to "Heat-seeking missles?  Why not fly-by-wire or
> > radar-guided or...  They just wanted an excuse to blow up buildings, I guess."
>
> We have a 500 ton critter doing over 80 mph, and it's not throwing off
> any heat?  Right.  Godzilla should need to jump in the river just to
> cool off.
>
> And nobody can find Godzilla, despite the fact that he's radioactive?
> Doesn't the Army own any Geiger counters?

I totally agree with this. On the other hand, in light of India's
'surpise' nuclear testing, military intelligence is becoming more of
an oxymoron every day!

My addition to your criticisms is this:

If you were faced with a Godzilla, would you send a stammering,
half-incompetent field commander like the one played by Doug Savant
to lead the troops into battle?

--  Nick