BOC/BRAIN: part the second of the Meltzer minifest

[Bolts of Ungodly Vision]

[here's the text of the review]:

Ran into Eric ("Don't call me Manny") Bloom of the BOC formerly known as
Stalk-Forrest Group f/k/a Oaxaca f/k/a the Soft White Underbelly the other
nite following him and his band's smash 2nd fiddle to the Faces at Madison
Square Garden home of the New York (but you can have em Sheboygan) Rangers
and the old coozehound (he once got crabs in his beard) tells me I will not
be receiving my long-awaited royalty smackola from Secret Treaties for the
next umpteen sometimes to come.  Baaaaaad news in light of the $2500  total
I pocketed in '74 for  everything I wrote for every magazoon the entire
goddamn year but seems B.O'Cult Music Publishing Inc. decided this poor
struggling beat combo had more pressing need of the songwirting boodle due
to heavy travel expenses to Jersy and Pennsylvania and leather hot pants
and studded belts and ugly space bracelets and all the rest-o-things
required for projecting the menacing "now" look of today's rock and roll.
        Hey I'm not complaining that Patti Smith got _her_ royalites from "Career
of Evil" altho she ain't even in the band because Pearlman things if he
pays her he can get in her pants even tho she's with Allen Lanier (when
she's not  with Tom Verlaine).... not at all.  Cause Eric--formerly known
as Roy Mucilage-- tells me not to worry as their newie is _bound to go
gold_ (promises, promises:  said the same thing last time) (Pearlman said
it tho, not E. "M." Bloom) and since I got a song on it ("Harvester of
Eyes") I won't hafta be pickin up no varicose standing on bread lines.
        YEah, well goody goody gumdrops, pretty penny's gonna be coming my way in
no time flat, who could axe for anything more?  But like I said I've heard
it before so I guess I'll hafta play it safe and encourage a gold ruch with
a STRICTLY POSITIVE REVIEW. Don't suppose these paragraphs're gonna sell or
unsell more'n 3 or 4 copies but you never can tell, people might just
suddenly be nutser than squirrels and the printed rock word--who knows?--
may usddenly somehow've gotten bigger (in Shreveport and altoona)tan the
flugging bible, it's certainly worth the gamble and the effort and what the
hell anyway, this review should net me a solid 2 figures.
        Okay, lessee, um well for one thing (my record player's been bust since
April but I did get to hear it on cassette in a vehicle) Don Roeser's back
in form. Time was ('68-'69,'70) good ole Don was the goshdamn kind of them
all, back then you would have to've said out of the 10 hottest geetar solos
live or in the sutdio at least 9 of em had to be his (I ain't kiddin). In
the interim he kind of slipped a couple-three-four-five notches but who
cares cause he wasn't talkin to me no more anyway. Seems I'm SUPPOSED to've
messed up his wedding tho all I did was fondly his mom around the chest and
hind (nice..._nice_) and yell out "Sandi Nazi! Sandi Nazi!" (that's Don's
wife altho she spells it Nasci) and me and Allen each both threw beer
bottles thru a window or something, y'know just havin a good time and in
fact I even already got punished (by KARMA) by arrivin home all sick and
hung over with _shit in my pants_ from not wiping thorough enough (most
passengers in Pearlman's car thought the odor was from Manny but the fact
is it was _me_) so you'd think the Roesers woulda forgave me but no such
luck.  Well anyway DON'S PLAYING IS NOW TOP OF THE HEAP ONCE MORE, THE
TOPMOST TOPMOST TOP AND THAT'S NO LIE.
        As a great showcase of pickin as you'd ever wanna hear (c'mon Donny-Boy,.
time to lift a tall coool one with your old bud Dick again!)  and my pal
Terry Atkinson listens to  it ever day while shavin the hairs off his face
and even after he's done cause he sez it is _that good_ -- he oughta know
cause he's played it more than  me. Rest of the Cultboys are in
ace/primo/A-1 form as well and now that I've complimented all you fuckers
how's about usin more of my lyrics next time studio obligations rear their
head and I mean two or three or four (such as: "I Live With the Roaches,"
"A Wrestling Kind of Love" and "Just Like Hansel and Gretel" but whicever
ones you wanna use is fine by me, I'm tolerant). [Well, 1 out of  3 20
years or so later isn't too bad :) - J]
        Really folks, readers of this sheet, this elpee's their best since the one
they cut for Elektra back in '70 (hey David Geffen if you're readin this
and all those Cher lawsuits aren't getting you down, THAT'S THE ONE
Y'REALLY OUGHTA RELEASE, IT'LL MAKE YOU MORE THAN BOBBY DYLAN DID, NO
SHIT, IT'S IN THE VAULT THERE SOMEWHERE UNDER EITHER OAXACA OR THE
STALK-FORREST GROUP).  Nah, this one's even better, 2 records (a "double")
so it's _twice_ as good, maybe even 2.6 and I'm not talking Richter scale.
Swear to god, I wouldn't lie.
        Why would I lie?


[well, ever more intrique aboute hte Roeser wedding cleared up. very odd
rantish review. I dig the Don-centricness of the article. Rest of the book
reads very simialr to this with wild zany experiments in style to boot. We
should flood elektra's email with SFG/Oaxaca LP requests :) ... it really
is a
good slab o' wax . Back to the policy machine. Jason]
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"I'm in a FOUL mood today. Stay outa my way or I'll CRITIQUE YOUR ASS to
hell. Just ME, just YOU...a decent song. You wanna see THEM, see THEM. I
don't give a ****." -  Richard Meltzer
------------------------------------------------------------------------------