.title Planet of the Eternal Slumber Party
.fg 20
.c;^&Planet of the Eternal Slumber Party\&
.s
.c;Michael Sterner
.nmpg 1
.page
.;
.lm 8.p -8.at
Narrator: The year is 1993. NASA is about to embark upon its first manned 
 interstellar space flight. Two of its top astronausts, Paul and Mike, are
 about to be the first human beings to depart from the boundaries when 
 catastrophe stuck! A malfunction in the ship's deluxe Cuisinart caused them
 to be hurled thousands of light years off course. They crash land on an
 unknown planet in an uncharted solar system, at the edge of the galaxy, 
 teetering on the edge of terror -- ON THE PLANET OF THE ETERNAL SLUMBER
 PARTY !!!
Paul: Boy, that was some fall we took.
Mi: Yeah, the ship was completely destroyed, but we escaped unscratched.
Paul: Lucky for us we landed on that pile of pillows.
Mi: Look, Paul. Someone's coming. Quick, behind those sleeping bags.
A1: Hey, let's make another call.
A2: OK, who should we call this time?
A1: I know. (he dials) Hello? Ace Bowling Supplies? Yeah, I was interested
 in a possible purchase. Do you have ten pound balls? (pause) Yeah? Well,
 then how do you walk? (they all laugh)
A2: Hey, who are those guys? (they stand ready for danger)
Pa: We are on a mission of peace. Please take us to your leader.
A1: Hey, look at those crazy pajamas.
Pa: We must speak with whomever is in charge.
Mi: They don't seem to understand English.
A3: Hi. Ya want some popcorn? Chip and dip? Seven-Up?
Pa: What ...?
A2: Hey, gang, let's play another game of twister!
Everybody: OK (music begins to play. Mike has been coerced into playing
 Twister by one of the Aliens) (the doorbell rings)
Paul: Yes. (as he opens it)
Pizza Man: Pepperoni Pizza for Mr. Dick Hurtz. (everyone laughs, except
 for Paul, that is. He leaps dramatically across the room, his back
 to a wall)
Paul: No, No ...
A3: Hey, everybody ! How about some Blind-Man's Bluff!
A1: Yeah, yeah (all) And you'll be it. (he ties a cloth around Paul's
 head. Everyone laugs playfully and dodges his stuggle)
Paul: No, no, NO, NO !!!! (he slumps into a corner).
A2: Oh, he's no fun. He fell right over.
A1: Hey, let's make another phone call !
Mike: I know one. (he dials) Hello? Drugstore? Yeah, do you have Prince 
 Albert in a can?
Paul: No, no, no ... (he attackes the phone)
Mike: Well, you'd better let him out before he suffocates ...
Paul: No! Listen to me, Mike. We've got to get out of here. Do you
 understand?!
Mike: What's wrong with you, Paul? Is there some law against a guy
 having a little fun?
A3: What's his problem?
Mike: Here. Why don't you have another bowl of popcorn?
.p0
Paul flings the bottle against the wall and slugs Mike across the jaw
 knocking him out. Everyone else grabs a pillow and begins fighting
 and laughing while Paul drags Mike off.
.p-8
Narrator: Thousands of games of Monopoly. Hours and hours of third-rate
 science-fiction movies. Truckloads of popcorn. Finally Chief-Astronaut
 Paul could take it no longer. Using the fuel left in the ship's tanks, he
 caused a horrific explosion sending the tiny planet flinging out of its
 eternal orbit of darkness and into the sunlight for the first time. The
 very first dawn of a new age ... on ... THE PLANET OF THE ETERNAL SLUMBER
 PARTY !!!
Mike: What... (rubbing his jaw) What happened?
Paul: Looks like it's going to be a beautiful morning.
All: (all yawn, stretch, say "I'm tired")
Mike: Why, they're all falling asleep.
Paul: I'm not surprised. They haven't slept for the past four billion years.
Mike: Talk about an all-nighter. But Paul, how are we going to get
 out of here?
Paul: Maybe we'd better just sleep on it.